Word of the Post
Today's word is: cacophony
/ca*coph"o*ny/ noun
Harsh or discordant sound; Loud, uncouth or disagreeable sounds; noise. In words, harsh letters or syllables side by side. I think of an orchestra tuning up, not all together, like the noise at the beginning of Fantasia. This could also represent a lot of people talking at once.
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It is official. My mother had a heart attack on Tuesday, sometime before she was admitted to the hospital. She said she remembered her arm hurting, but that went away after a while. Not exactly the news you want to hear about your mom, especially after knowing she was in the hospital for three days. She is home tonight, so praise God for that.
I picked a word today that somewhat described my mood. I have been in a funk lately. I don't know why, really. I just have this... feeling. Things in my life are out of balance. I am trying to do too much, accomplishing too little, and feeling very much without a focus. Which is what I was hoping to fix by eliminating the job that was not really helping me. All the work I was doing was drawing me away from myself. Now that the job is gone, I don't feel well as myself. I feel bogged down. I feel as if things are happening TO me, not with me or for me. I feel I have lost control. (Did I ever really have control?)
So I have added exercise with my friend four to five days per week, and have done little bits of computer work and housework each day. Admittedly, there has not been enough housework done. I could do more, but the perfectionist side of me sees the mess in the middle of the cleaning, not the product of the clean house to come. And the procrastinator in me wants to throw in the towel before the task is complete.
I ask you to pray for me. I need to work more and complain less. This is one of the reasons I have taken the assignment from God to GO. I am going to St. Louis this coming week, and I need this trip. Not just to help my friend, but to help me. I need to see that things could be so different (notice I didn't say so much worse) for me. I have been blessed, and it is going to take a little 4 year old girl to show me how blessed.
God Bless all who enter here.
3 comments:
I'll definitely be praying for you, Chelf. I hope things go well on your trip and that you what you learn surprises you rather than meeting your expectations.
I appreciate you sharing on my blog. I will keep you in my prayers. Sometimes we become stagnant in our own surroundings that God provides another view to show us His blessings. I think God is doing just that. Keep us posted on your mother.
Also, I wonder if I know you...we know alot of the same people.
Enjoy God's fresh perspective in St. Louis.
Natalie
Michelle? Is that you? I think you've been on my blog before but I don't remember you telling me you finally got a blog of your own.
Sorry about your mom. I hate when things get out of whack. I hope you feel better soon and that the situation with your mom also gets better. God bless.
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