What I Should Have Said Was...

Word of the Post
Today's word is: enmity
/en"mi*ty/ noun
Hostility or unfriendly disposition; the quality of being an enemy; a state of deep-seated ill will.
I try to be a nice person, but sometime enmity attacks my spirit. I feel it in return to the people who display it.
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Yesterday, I was at the grocery store with Roadrunner and her two boys. The boys were being boys. They were not, however, being boys run amok with orneriness. They were not in the way, not running away, not disobeying (yet), and not even showing a little bit of hyper. There was a woman who walked past us, as she was leaving the store, and apparently the big boy was in her way. I don't see how he was in her way, he was next to me.

She walked past us, mumbling hateful things. The parts I heard were "BOY, you better move out of my way!" and "GAWD, I am glad I am not a parent, Thank GAWD, I am thankful I am not a parent!" I have to admit that the anger rose in me. Quickly, fiercely rose in me, and stayed there for a while. I yelled at her, "Yeah, well, SO ARE WE!"

The way she called my buddy "BOY" was rude. I don't want to make this about race. She was a mad woman. I can tell you she was black and she said it the same way white slave owners in the deep south used to call black people "BOY". It was uncalled for, because he was not in the way. It was mean and hateful. What a horrible way to treat another human!

I realize that there are several factors here. One, I am not a parent either. This wasn't my child she insulted. Their mother didn't hear the hate. The boys didn't hear the hate. But these boys were not misbehaving in any way. There was no reason for her to be angry at them just for existing. Two, I want more than anything to become a parent. I can't explain it, I just desire it. She doesn't. That makes no difference to me. I get tired of hearing other people's kids screaming or shouting rude comments. I get angry at those same children who disrespect their parents, and I get angrier that the parents don't do anything about it. Three, the way she "prayed" to GAWD made me angry. To thank God is one thing, but to be so flippant with His name was sharp on my nerves. And Four, I am not sorry that I yelled back at her. I AM ALSO glad that she is not a parent. Why would I wish her to be a parent if I know that she would raise her children in the same rude, mean, hateful manner? I am sure that God knows that her children would be terrors. Good for Him to make sure that she does not have children.

The last point here is the one that scares me. I was hateful to her, too. I do not know who the woman was, nothing about her age, her education, her culture. Her voice sounded just like a woman I used to work with, and that may have been more of a nail on the chalkboard of my nerves than what she actually said. I could have chosen to ignore it, and never told Roadrunner that some random woman at the store was rude to her son. But I chose to yell, and that was not a good example to anyone.

I need to stop and think before I speak. I have always had a quick tongue and temper. This is against the ideal of the person I want to become. I obviously have a lot of work to do. God has a lot of work to do in me.

The Yellow Rose Of Texas, Amarillo

Word of the Post
Today's word is: intransitive
/in*tran"si*tive/ adjective
Designating a verb that does not require or cannot take a direct object; an action which does not require an object to complete the sense; as, an intransitive verb, e.g., the bird flies, the dog runs.
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The ear infection is still here. I have a resistant head. My mother would call it "stubborn", but I prefer to think of it as "independent". My colds and infections have always taken 10 days of antibiotics. If they gave me just 7, they would end up giving me 7 more. And I hate to take pills, especially when it hurts to swallow or it is difficult to breathe. My head still feels like I have cotton in my ears. The doctor only gave me the antibiotic, not a decongestant. So, I have added DayQuil to the daily pill popping. I hope to be able to hear and to sing on Sunday.

We recently upgraded our computer. There are a few small adjustments to be made when upgrading, but we have done well with them. DH is good at his job, which at home means he is my tech support desk. I can usually hunt-and-peck for the things I need, and I am not afraid to push buttons to see where they go and what they do. For some applications, things have really changed, and I had to ask him what to look for. Then, my Hotmail upgraded me by surprise, and I had to find my missing email group. Which took a few minutes. Considering that I wanted to send them pictures, I had to find them. All is now well, I found them, and modified the group nickname to show up when I type what I need. I guess Hotmail warned me that this was coming, but I kept throwing away their stupid junk-looking emails. Guess they weren't all junk.

I have been doing laundry like the machine is going out of style. I have so much dirty laundry, and the piles grow everyday. Silly DH, he likes to wear clean clothes to work. Then there are towels, and bedsheets. This job never stops. Laundry, my nemesis, and Dishes, his closest cousin and sidekick. I fight the evil a little bit every day, and they still plague my home. All I can think of it is this: What will I do when I have kids? This will only get worse! I visit FlyLady.net at least once a week, just for a little emotional boost. I am not behind, I can jump in right where I am. Such a calm voice in the midst of my C.H.A.O.S. (Can't Have Anyone Over Syndrome). I really like this site. It gives me hope that, someday, I can have a clean-looking home, enough to fool the unexpected guests. First, I have too much work to do, and I sit here feeling overwhelmed. It is in the darkest hours that FlyLady brings me rays of sunshine. I can do small bits, everyday, and they will add up to a clean home in the future. For now, though, I have a Mess of the tallest stacked caliber.

I have threatened in the past to rent a small bulldozer, and push all the junk out of my house, in order to start fresh. I figure I need to put all the stuff I want to keep in my bedroom, and lock the door. Then I need to open the place up to an estate sale, and let someone come get all the junk out of my house. Probably more clean that way, than pushing the stuff to the corner with a Bobcat. Think of the money I could make!

I am off now to prepare for our trip to Amarillo. Mom wants a salad dressing that she can't buy in New Mexico, so I have to buy a case of it for her. I need to call her, and get some chiles. Yum!

A Penny In My Pocket - Burning A Hole

Word of the Post
Today's word is: ululate
/ul"yuh*layt/ or /yool"yuh*layt/ intransitive verb
To howl, as a dog or wolf; to wail; as, ululating jackals.
I don't really yet know what "intransitive" exactly entails. I am working on it. That part of speech stuff was a LONG time ago for me. That will probably be the next word. While you wait, you may ululate.
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I am going to go out today and "shop, shop, shop until I drop, drop, drop". This is Oklahoma's tax-free weekend. We are trying to keep business here, instead of consumers going to Texas to do their back to school shopping. I need jeans, and baby gifts. Roadrunner's kids need school uniforms. We are going to go together.

I have an ear infection (this is far too common for me). I got to the doctor yesterday, and now have medicine. The coughing is not as bad, but the headaches are not going away, and I feel like I have cotton in both ears. Ugh. I HATE being sick. It is no fun. But, I will be fine in a few days.

Jelly Bean now has a toy microphone that she carries around the house, taking requests. Karaoke Kiddo! She is really good at "Baa, Baa Black Sheep" and "Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star". She even pauses for applause when she is done. She is so clever. It makes me laugh out loud to hear stories of her cuteness.

Go for a moment to Lisa's Perspective, she has a picture on her post that is amazing. The human brain is still such a mystery to doctors. How can people say there is no God, when the complex and minute (very small, not time) cannot be explained or reproduced?

Accident has never produced such complexity; even fortuitous accidents cannot produce the sheer quantity of complexities this world holds. Explaining the existence of the Earth, and all the animals and plants that live here, by evolution is as likely as piling a lot of lumber in a pit and using dynamite to have an explosion, and expecting it to build you a house. Change over time is ultimately true, but things left alone will only decay, not improve. Even adaptation is only a lateral move.

That seems enough deep thought for the day.

Have a great weekend, everyone!